Home
 

A Confession of an Angry Man

A CONFESSION OF AN ANGRY MAN

MIKE CUNNINGHAM

JUNE 3, 2007

If we’re honest with ourselves we have to admit we’ve been getting angry for as long as we can remember. We must also acknowledge the fact that no one had to teach me how to become angry. In my own case there were occasional times my Mom may have blown up in exasperation with my younger sister and brother and me, but no one could say we lived in an angry home with parents who were loose-cannons and crummy role models.

My anger just came naturally. It was part of my nature.

I still remember an incident that occurred when I was about five or six years old and living with my family in Brooklyn. My Mom had me all washed up. My hands and face, including my ears were clean, and my hair was brushed neatly. She had me dressed in a new pair of pants and a shirt which I wasn’t supposed to get dirty and which I didn’t want to be wearing in the first place.

I also didn’t want to have my picture taken by one of those photographers who roamed the city streets carrying a big box camera mounted on a wooden tri-part in one hand and holding the reins attached to a smelly pony with the other. All my proud Mom wanted her boy to do was stand next to the animal, hold its reins, look into the camera, smile and say cheese, and trust the man who said, “Don’t worry kid. It won’t be in your picture. Ha ha, as he pointed at the pony’s recently deposited bowel movement while my mother nodded in agreement. I was a big city kid unaccustomed to being around that kind of stuff and I freaked out and threw a temper tantrum.

That old photo of me as a little boy holding on to the animals reins with an obviously phony smile on my flushed face is still around in our home somewhere, but I don’t think I have ever told anyone about that particular temper tantrum until now. I knew it was wrong even at that early age, but the truth is I really didn’t care. I also haven’t shared the details of the occasional ones I threw while I was a young man in my twenties up until my early forties. That’s how ashamed I am of myself. And all because I didn’t get my own way or someone disagreed with me, or the food or drink wasn’t hot or cold enough, or another person didn’t live or act according to my expectations or whatever.

I’ve been angry with classmates, teachers, bosses and coworkers, baseball players and total strangers who seem to ignore the ten item limit at a grocery store check out. Throughout the years some of the folks I’ve been angriest with have also been those I love the most; the people the Lord had planned and ordained to be my family. Until I figured out what was happening, there were times when I’ve gotten angry with my wife while we were driving in our car. Despite her insistence that she did, I angrily accused her of not answering me. This continued for several years until I momentarily took my eyes off the road and saw her silently nodding her head up and down or side to side in answer to something I said.

I have also gotten angry with other drivers. So much so, that I’ve given each of them a name. The same name! Regardless of their gender; my wife and kids and grandchildren have heard me shout things such as: “Come on Charlie, move it.” Or, “Hey Charley you idiot, who taught you how to drive? I don’t do that anymore, but whenever one of those loved ones are a passenger in our car and another driver cuts us off or whatever, he or her will shout something such as: knock it off Charlie, followed by a hearty laugh.

Although the folks who have been the recipients of my outbursts of anger wouldn’t make lite of it, each of them would agree it paled in comparison to that of those evil people who brutally rape, torture or murder their victims in an unspeakable manner. The monstrous acts committed against little children in our society are legend and just as hideous as the atrocities occurring in “hot spots” such as Sudan and the Middle East.

Now allow me to ask you a question. If it were possible to inoculate all human beings, including new born baby’s the moment they leave their mother’s womb with an anti-anger vaccine which would eradicate anger from our planet, would the world be a better place in which to live? Can you imagine yourself never getting angry and having to experience the often painful consequences of your behavior or being on the other end of someone’s bitterness, hatred and contempt for you? Would living in such an environment remind you of what it must be like being with the Lord in Heaven?

Have you ever wondered what the root cause of all our anger is? Perhaps then we could be able to get rid of it. Many folks conclude that it’s a result of sin entering our world back in “The Garden of Eden.” If only Adam and Eve hadn’t sinned you and I would never see any expressions of anger. Do you think that’s the reason? If you do, you’re wrong.

Would you believe me if I were to tell you that our anger is a precious gift from our Creator God and as such it’s truly priceless? Well it is. Furthermore, nowhere in the Bible will you find anything telling us to get rid of it. By now some of you may be thinking, “not so fast Mike. Slow down. What are we to make of the following warnings from the Apostle Paul?

Colossians 3:8 (ESV) 8 But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.

Ephesians 4:31 (ESV) 31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.

These verses do seen to be pretty straightforward don’t they?” How can we get around them, especially when they’re not isolated? Consider the following which are only a sampling.

Proverbs 21:19 (ESV) 19 It is better to live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman.

Psalms 37:8 (NKJV) 8 Cease from anger, and forsake wrath; Do not fret–it only causes harm.

Think about how anger has sometimes played out in the lives of well known Biblical characters. The first instance of anger in human history was directed against God.

Genesis 4:5-6 (ESV) 5 but for Cain and his offering he had no regard. So Cain was very angry, and his face fell. 6 The Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry, and why has your face fallen?

Numbers 20:11-12 (ESV) 11 And Moses lifted up his hand and struck the rock with his staff twice, and water came out abundantly, and the congregation drank, and their livestock. 12 And the Lord said to Moses and Aaron, “Because you did not believe in me, to uphold me as holy in the eyes of the people of Israel, therefore you shall not bring this assembly into the land that I have given them.”

Numbers 22:27 (ESV) 27 When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord, she lay down under Balaam. And Balaam’s anger was kindled, and he struck the donkey with his staff.

2 Chronicles 16:10 (ESV) 10 Then Asa was angry with the seer and put him in the stocks in prison, for he was in a rage with him because of this. And Asa inflicted cruelties upon some of the people at the same time.

Jonah 4:4 (NKJV) 4 Then the Lord said, “Is it right for you to be angry?”

Ephesians 4:31 (NIV) 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.

Colossians 3:8 (NIV) 8 But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.

It’s obvious these sinful things would not have occurred if human beings weren’t able to get angry in the first place. It also seems as though the Apostle Paul is telling those first century Christians to get rid of some things God considers to be sinful. Included in the list is anger. Then can I say that our anger is a precious gift given to us by God?

For starters, I want to say two things. First, some Bible verses don’t always mean what they appear to be saying, but they do always mean what they say. Secondly not only do I believe our anger is a precious gift from God, but it’s so priceless that I wouldn’t want to get rid of my anger for anything in the world. Paul’s letter to the Galatians provides additional insight as to what he was speaking about in his letters to the Ephesians and Colossians. Speaking about some of the sinful works of the flesh, Paul wrote:

Galatians 5:19-20 (ESV) 19 Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, 20 idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions,

It isn’t our anger he warns us to get rid of but rather a sinful expression of it. It’s one thing to be angry with the person who cuts our hair mistakenly trimming off more than we wanted as opposed to throwing a fit of rage and giving full vent to our anger.

Ephesians 4:26-27 (ESV) 26 Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, 27 and give no opportunity to the devil.

In other words, by all means get angry if it’s justified. The Holy Spirit inspired the Apostle Paul this issue. Consider the following godly wish of a transparently honest angry apostle. Paul was speaking about folks within the church who were disrupting the members by making a big deal out of circumcision. Look at Paul’s heart-felt desire.

Galatians 5:12 (ESV) 12 I wish those who unsettle you would emasculate themselves!

Galatians 5:12 (AMP) 12 I wish those who unsettle and confuse you would [go all the way and] cut themselves off!

Paul wishes that those guys would castrate themselves. Cut the thing off. He is speaking in righteous anger and there is a need for it to be expressed. Throughout the past two thousand plus years followers of the Risen Savior have become so angry that they rescued and took into their own homes new born infants who were abandoned by their parents by the side of the road to be food for wild animals and birds of prey. Godly anger was one of the driving forces in the creation of the first hospitals and orphanages in the world. God used His people’s anger to abolish slavery and partial birth abortion. And it was anger that finally began the unmasking of the evil cover-up of predator priests.

Personally, a little over twenty five years ago I couldn’t help being angry when I learned some of our down and out neighbors were sleeping in railroad box cars and garbage dumpsters in order to escape the ravages of our often brutal Vermont winters. A little later I discovered that there was no place for the homeless to get a meal for their dinner. I became very angry about the dilemma of the homeless, so much so, and with the Lords blessing, He used me and several other angry citizens to found a non-profit organization which today is known as “The Committee on Temporary Shelter” and “The Friendly Kitchen” at the Burlington Salvation Army. I could continue, but I know each of you have the picture by now.

For His glory and the good of His creatures the Lord God gave the gift of anger to each of them. Anger is an innate instinct God placed within all human beings the capacity to become naturally aroused and opposed to that which is wrong or evil, so much so that we are strongly inclined to do something good about it. It is intended to be harnessed and controlled for the betterment of society as opposed to allowing our anger to control us and we quickly lash out at someone with our tongue.

Although anger truly is a priceless gift from our Creator there have been times when God’s children should have done something but didn’t.

2 Corinthians 7:10-11 (AMP) 10 For godly grief and the pain God is permitted to direct, produce a repentance that leads and contributes to salvation and deliverance from evil, and it never brings regret; but worldly grief (the hopeless sorrow that is characteristic of the pagan world) is deadly [breeding and ending in death]. 11 For [you can look back now and] observe what this same godly sorrow has done for you and has produced in you: what eagerness and earnest care to explain and clear yourselves [of all complicity in the condoning of incest], what indignation [at the sin], what alarm, what yearning, what zeal [to do justice to all concerned], what readiness to mete out punishment [to the offender]! At every point you have proved yourselves cleared and guiltless in the matter.

The Corinthian men finally came to their senses and became angry with themselves for being so apathetic towards the blatant sin of incest being engaged in by a professed Christian. So much so, that they repented of their sin of tolerant silence. Prior to their repentance they were calloused and indifferent. “Live and let live. You do your thing and I’ll do mine’ seemed to have been their motto.

Initially there was no righteous indignation any more that there is with all too many of today’s Americans concerning the sin of homosexually. The newly released [May 29th] Gallup Poll of U. S. adults indicated that 57% say homosexuality “should be considered an acceptable alternative lifestyle.”59 percent say homosexual relations should be legal. 47 percent say they personally believe homosexual relations are morally acceptable.” And their Creator God says it is an abomination in His eyes (Leviticus 18:22). And all too many Christians have grown so apathetic that they sin by not getting angry, and then lovingly and with all humility speak the truth about this grave sin at every God given opportunity.

I have already mentioned several examples of some things God wants us to be aroused and angry and act. It’s our God given responsibility to do something as simple as displaying a bumper sticker or writing letters to the newspaper editor, or our elected lawmakers and reminding them that often a single vote makes the difference in the outcome of an election.

In confronting another person we must guard against coming across as a mean spirited in-your-face bitterly angry know-it all. Instead, with a Christ-like spirit of humility we must speak the truth in love by presenting it in a respectful manner and not attempt to ram it down the other person’s throat. In other words, we must emulate Jesus by displaying a genuine heart-felt love for the other person and a sincere hatred for his or her sin. And then pray the Lord will be pleased to add His blessing to our witness of love.

Print Friendly, PDF & Email

June 3, 2007 Posted by Categories: Uncategorized 1 comment

One Response to “A Confession of an Angry Man”


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Top